- November 14, 2005, the Monday after a horrific weekend car accident severely injuring a former student of mine, Abby Mize (who was at the time a high school senior at a different school, having transferred from Wellington after her freshman year due to redistricting);
- September 12, 2001, the day after the terrorist attacks on New York City and Washington, D.C.; and
- December 17, 2012, the first day of classes following the killing of 26 individuals, including 20 elementary school children, in Newtown, Connecticut.
Each morning - each day - had a different approach, a different feel, in terms of how I went into the classroom. The Monday following Abby's accident, I was an emotional basket case, Several students, who were very close friends with Abby, used my shoulder as a crying towel; the classroom discussions were somber and emotional. Most of my non-debate students didn't know her, as she had not been enrolled at Wellington for more than two years. But they patiently listened to my explanation of what had transpired, and in many ways were my emotional crutch while I was being the same source of support for debaters.
The post-9/11 day was a very interesting challenge, which I briefly (and partially) addressed in the first few paragraphs of a previous blog, "Plato, Aristotle, Socrates: Morons". That morning's first class of the day (English IV Honors, British Literature) opened with me reciting a little speech I had prepared about the events of the previous day, followed by the noted open reading and discussion of Chaucer. (I addressed the entire "day-of" events in a different blog, "8:46 am, September 11, 2001.")
And then ... there was today.
I spent a lot of time over the weekend thinking about how I would approach this day. It was, in many ways, a watershed moment for me as an educator. The events last Friday morning in Connecticut had opened up an entirely new Pandora's Box of concerns, many of which I was (and still am) trying to comprehend. Unlike the other two moments I listed, they took place on public school property. And as opposed to prior events, they involved extremely young children. This was no Virginia Tech, where a college student went after fellow college students. it was no Columbine, where a pair of misfit high school students targeted their peers. This was not Aurora, or Milwaukee, or any other high-profile mass killing spree.
One of the things that helped me focus on today's classroom forum was an email I (and other district staff) received from our superintendent, Wayne Gent. I have included the complete email at the bottom of this post, but the primary things I kept in my mind were: modeling calm and control; reassuring children they are safe; telling the truth; sticking to the facts; and keeping my explanations developmentally appropriate.
In all but one of my classes (ironically, the varsity debate class) we had open forum discussions, where I first approached what happened with a general overview, then allowed students to both ask questions and voice opinions. Some students brought up gun control legislation and whether it would (or could) be effective. Some addressed mental health issues in society. Some posed whether the elementary students would be returning to their school. We discussed various states' laws allowing teachers to carry handguns on school property, and Israel's history in allowing just that to take place (noting, Israeli teachers have a ton of mandatory military experience before they enter the classroom, and face an immensely more imminent daily threat in their hallways). And we talked about school safety in general - the open layout of Wellington High School, the fact there is no 100% guarantee of safety, no matter what we do as a society and a school.
The topic of heroic teachers who sacrificed themselves for their students was brought up. I was asked whether I would do the same if, heaven forbid, I was in that position; my answer was, "Yes, I would do just that. In this classroom, I am your proxy parent, I am a protector. I would ensure as safe an environment as possible, to lock the door and get you as far away as possible from the door, and if need be personally barricade the entrance."
I told my students the same mantra I have presented to my debate families at our start-of-the-year parent meeting since becoming the Wellington Debate coach in 2002: "My two biggest priorities as debate coach are the health, safety and welfare of your children, and being fiscally responsible, and when the two come in conflict, I will always go with health, safety and welfare. I believe it is what you expect of me, as your proxy, and it is what your students expect of me, and it is what I expect of me."
I noted when I first heard the news Friday afternoon, my immediate first thoughts were of my three nephews in suburban Detroit, who are all in the same early elementary age range as the children murdered in Connecticut.
I also blasted the news media for the numerous errors in its reporting, going so far as to let them know, as a former journalist, I was embarrassed by the disconnect between informational points broadcast and printed the past 72 hours. (A few cases in point: identifying the wrong individual as the alleged perpetrator, and claiming his mother was a teacher at the elementary school where the attacks took place when she was not an employee; and what of those early reports of an accomplice who had been captured in a wooded area near the school?) I pointed out, as I did following 9/11, that it isn't information which causes individuals to be scared or confused, it's the lack of information, or misinformation, that leads to those fears, and that the reporting since Friday morning did not do many favors for those seeking the facts.
I noted it will take days, months, maybe even years, before we know most, if not all, of the answers on what happened. And that there will be plenty of conspiracies abound, both in the mainstream media and on forums like Facebook and Twitter.
The most common comment I heard, from students and fellow faculty, was the overriding inability to grasp our hands around what happened. The age of the children, and the number of children, taken from this earth for reasons both complex and unknown, boggle our minds. I don't profess to know what was going through the mind of the shooter; we may never know. Did he snap Friday? Or was this a prolonged process going back to his very early childhood foundation? Why the elementary school, as opposed to a group of individuals closer to his age? Why those specific classrooms? Why were the weapons (legally owned by his mother) out in the open, as opposed to being locked up?
So many questions. So little closure.
Friday was a changing of the world order, a paradigm shift in how we, as a society, view the fragile world of "safety" and "security" and "innocence." It took a chainsaw to the façade of the safe haven we have long associated with elementary schools.
Like tears in the rain, it no longer exists.
- - - - -
The School District of Palm Beach County joins the nation in expressing our sadness and shock at the horrific events at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut on Friday. Our thoughts and prayers go out to everyone affected by this heartbreaking tragedy. It is important to keep in mind that an event like this is rare. Schools are one of the safest places for children and youth during the school day, and an important place for them to receive support and return to normalcy. Communication and collaboration among schools, parents, and communities is critical in order to ensure that (as the school week begins) our students continue to view schools as safe, caring, and supportive environments. Furthermore, how adults handle this tragedy can also have an important impact on the way children and youth react and on their perceptions of safety.
This is to urge you to reinforce students’ sense of safety (since this has been a prominent topic of the media as events unfolded) by making classrooms predictable and welcoming, providing access to mental health supports as needed, and connecting families with other available resources after school hours. Families should be encouraged to spend time together, validate their children’s feelings, ask for help as needed, and find calm and relaxing activities to do at home. It is of utmost importance to limit children’s exposure to media coverage, particularly for young children. If children are watching the news or accessing information online, parents and caregivers should be available to talk to their children about it.
Families and educators play an important role on the front line of helping children understand and cope with this violence and loss of life. Most children and youth are resilient and will cope well with the support and caring of their families, teachers, friends, and other adults. However, young children may have particular difficulty understanding and describing their feelings and emotions.
The following are some suggestions to help our students deal with the aftermath of this tragic school shooting that has captured the attention of our nation and community:
All Adults Should:
1. Model calm and control. Children take their emotional cues from the significant adults in their lives. Avoid appearing anxious or frightened.For additional information on school safety and crisis response, and the role of school psychologists and other staff in supporting crisis, please refer to the procedures for utilization of Psychological Guidance Services in the Aftermath of a Crisis:2. Reassure children that they are safe and so are the other important adults in their lives. Depending on the situation, point out factors that help ensure their immediate safety and that of their community.
3. Remind them that trustworthy people are in charge. Explain that the government emergency workers, police, firefighters, doctors, and the military are helping people who are hurt and are working to ensure that no further tragedies occur.
4. Let children know that it is okay to feel upset. Explain that all feelings are okay when a tragedy like this occurs. Let children talk about their feelings and help put them into perspective. Even anger is okay, but children may need help and patience from adults to assist them in expressing these feelings appropriately.
5. Observe children’s emotional state. Depending on their age, children may not express their concerns verbally. Changes in behavior, appetite, and sleep patterns can also indicate a child’s level of grief, anxiety, or discomfort. Children will express their emotions differently. There is no right or wrong way to feel or express grief.
6. Look for children at greater risk. Children who have had a past traumatic experience or personal loss, suffer from depression or other mental illness, or with special needs may be at greater risk for severe reactions than others. Seek the help of mental health professionals if you are at all concerned.
7. Tell children the truth. Don’t try to pretend the event has not occurred or that it is not serious. Children are smart. They will be more worried if they think you are too afraid to tell them what is happening.
8. Stick to the facts. Don’t embellish or speculate about what has happened and what might happen. Don’t dwell on the scale or scope of the tragedy, particularly with young children.
9. Keep your explanations developmentally appropriate. Early elementary school children need brief, simple information that should be balanced with reassurances that the daily structures of their lives will not change. Upper elementary and early middle school children will be more vocal in asking questions about whether they truly are safe and what is being done at their school. They may need assistance separating reality from fantasy. Upper middle school and high school students will have strong and varying opinions about the causes of violence and threats to safety in schools and society. They will share concrete suggestions about how to make school safer and how to prevent tragedies in society. They will be more committed to doing something to help the victims and affected community. For all children, encourage them to verbalize their thoughts and feelings. Be a good listener!
10. Monitor your own stress level. Don’t ignore your own feelings of anxiety, grief, and anger. Talking to friends, family members, religious leaders, and mental health counselors can help. It is okay to let your children know that you are sad, but that you believe things will get better. You will be better able to support your children if you can express your own emotions in a productive manner. Get appropriate sleep, nutrition, and exercise.
The Center for School Mental Health has also compiled practical resources related to school crisis response that are free and readily available for use as needed:
http://csmh.umaryland.edu/Resources/OtherResources/CSMHListofTraumaResources.pdf
These websites have a multitude of resources for school psychologists, teachers, and all school staff, on how to assist students and families affected by school violence.
http://www.aboutourkids.org/articles/talking_kids_about_school_violence
http://www.naspcenter.org/crisis_safety/trauma.html
http://childdevelopmentinfo.com/parenting/talk-to-kids-violence.shtml
Should your students need additional support in dealing with the grief and trauma arising as an unintended consequence of this tragedy, please contact your Area office so that appropriate staff is deployed to coordinate efforts for crisis response and counseling as needed.
Thank you for your efforts in ensuring that our students receive the proper structure, guidance, and supports necessary during the aftermath of this crisis as they return back to their classrooms for another school week.
Wayne Gent, Superintendent
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